Our homes are kind of transforming I would say right? They are the all in one place at the moment. This scene with my diffuser going and the counters clean and the teeny fairy lights lit up gives me all the good feelings even tho 88% of the time my kitchen does not look like this LOL. Our homes aren’t our safe space or our retreat anymore – so much more life is happening inside the walls everyday.
It’s so hard to let go of what we knew as normal and keep stepping forward every day into unknown. I had an interesting moment last night and I decided to share it here with you guys, maybe it would help you too who are struggling with grasping for control over these chaotic days.
Last night as I was laying in bed, I had a lot of swirling thoughts. I’ve had many nights like this lately – a lot going on in the world, people I am worried about, dreams that I’m excited/terrified about, taking care of my oils business and my members, etc. We all have a lot on our plates. Some of you SO much more than others and I’m very conscious of that. Doesn’t matter who has more or less though, we’ve all been affected in some way.
As I laid there, I heard this song come into my head by Steff Gretzinger – Letting Go. And the chorus started playing out in my head and I saw myself on a little boat out in the ocean, and I was holding a bunch of thick ropes that I realized were attached to a bunch of other little boats just like mine. My grip on these ropes were wicked tight, these were all MINE and I. Wasn’t. Letting. Go. I felt this little prompting in myself (hi Holy Spirit, thank you) to take a deep breath, and to let go of the ropes. As I was breathing in, I could slowly feel the tension releasing and the ropes just casually slipped out of my hands into the water.
Each boat had its own thing that it represented, personal things to me that I did not realize how tightly I had been gripping. Sometimes you don’t realize how much tension you’ve been holding until you actually let it go.
Might some a little hooey to some people, but I think this spiritual and visual practice is really important. And I’m probably going to have to do this daily bc I want so badly to believe that I have full control over these boats, when really the tiniest wave could sweep them away out of my reach, out of my grasp, no matter how tight I was gripping them.
Now I was just left to observe the boats and watch them sit there, not anxious that they might float away or be overtaken, just watching.
And my hands were freed up to hold tightly onto the hands of my Jesus, as he leads me anywhere he darn well pleases.
What are all the little boats you’re holding on to? What could you fill your hands with if you weren’t holding so tightly to those ropes?
I don’t know if this visual helps anyone else, but it definitely helped me. As we take things day by day, we are invited into a daily communion with the Holy Spirit in order to get what we need for THAT day.